Joy Adler, Blog
Joy Adler B.S.H.P.
Brennan Science Healing Practitioner
FBSH Leader for The Barbara Brennan School of Healing
Tribute to Stef DelPrete
Tonight my heart is heavy, I am bereft. My client and former student just passed away from cancer. This was her fourth bout in her short, 33 years of life. This time she didn’t win, she surrendered.
Her third bout, she fought so hard, and was cancer free for a couple of years, and I watched her soar! She got back to marathon running, attended healing school, and raised her young children. And when the family relocated to New Zealand, although she didn’t really want to go, being who she was; she made the best of it. At first she felt lost, as is often the case when one relocates so far away. I encouraged her to keep using her arts to connect to herself. She took that tenacious NY-American-go-for-it- attitude, and she rocked it! She wrote and published heartfelt articles about her journey in life. She studied to become a massage therapist and yoga teacher. She became a sought after voice-over artist, and actress. A year and a half ago, she was sending stills from a major movie that she had a featured role in.
But today her bright light, like a shooting star that shined for a time in our sky-- is gone. My heart goes out to her children. Looking back on these last months, although she was in horrendous pain, her spirit was so strong that any bit of energy she had- even after the last series of chemo/radiation, and even the amputation of her leg, she would keep creating and being there for her kids. Her friend would help her make videos of her reading them their favorite stories, because she was so concerned with how they would feel losing her. She made a journal for her husband, and skyped with family regularly. Last month, when she became paralyzed, being the eternally positive person that she was, she said “Joy, who knew what a blessing paralysis is? I’m not in that horrific pain anymore.” Today one of my greatest teachers passed from this world to the next. As a tribute to her, I am going to do my best to see each situation that I experience as a positive one. I’ll keep striving to go beyond my own set limitations to really love and cherish those that are in my life, while continuing to live my own dreams. And I’ll remember that “health is wealth”, and not take it for granted! But for tonight, the sky seems just a little bit darker, without her lighting it up...
Here is another tribute to Stef:
Read Stef's iconic blog: "Dear Cancer Patient"
I hope you are enjoying your Memorial Day! I've been resting here at the lake. I never tire of these views. As I recharge, my heart is filled knowing my Mom's family has returned safely from their sojourn to Arlington Memorial Cemetery. My Uncle Jim who was a medic in Vietnam, and his wife Mary were honored and laid to rest there this weekend. Two tremendous people who would do anything for anyone. They both were professional singers,...and I remember being so proud hearing their voices around me in church as a child, hoping I would be like them someday! This day brings to mind my Mom too. In 2008 I had an instinct that it was time to move home, and be with her. As difficult as it was to watch her failing, I will never regret having done that, I got to spend the last 18 months of her life with her. My mother was a singer and a healer also. I learned so much from her, and many of my classes are from the lessons I gleaned. My mother gave everything, and at times it was at the expense of her own health.
I decided that I would develop a curriculum that would teach others what I learned about balance. I hoped this would train them so that they would not burn out, and they'd be able to have life-long fulfilling careers by balancing caring for others with self-care and their art. I had already been teaching this for years, but it was while living with my Mom 5 years ago, when I had a vision to put together a series of events that professional caregivers could come to, and receive respite through spiritual teachings, meditations and music for healing. I called the events 'Community Heartshare'.
How blessed I was when the universe sent so many people to help me make this vision a reality! It was truly a group effort that culminated in having Patricia White Buffalo come in from CA to teach and play with my group The Souls of Evolution, while my friends from The Foundation for Global Humanity filmed it, and I had all of the events across 3 months in 2009, recorded live. Poets, Spiritual teachers and leaders, and incredible musicians, including a CNW graduate drum group that would jam for people to dance to at the end of every event! However, lIttle did I know how much work I was creating for myself! This has been an epic adventure to mix down. Hours and hours of concert recordings to listen too. At times, I needed to step away for months at a time, because my ears were tired.
But as I rest here on the lake, I know I am really gathering up my power to bring this album to completion as I have promised to do. To honor my Mother, and all the love she gave so freely. To honor myself and this vision, and to honor all those that were moved to help and participate. When this is finished, my prayer is that anyone who is drawn to listen, will find a bit of heaven in this recording, and just what they need. And in the end, I will break my ancestral cycle and balance being with doing....and with a little luck and guidance, continue to help others to learn this as well...
Holding Sacred Space
For me, it was an honor to be with family and my Mother in her final days., I've was gifted to sit "between the worlds" with her. Holding space, as she traveled back and forth, solidifying her choice, integrating her life's lessons before departing from her physical vessel. still moves me to think back upon.
There is so much love, wisdom and light being downloaded when we are near loved ones at this precious time! Things seem so clear, situations are being presented that cast shadows of illusion in our vibratory plane, as we have chosen to create with, in order to expand our consciousness in this life. In short, there is an opportunity for everyone to benefit, for ancestral healing to come forth as our beloveds slip beyond the veil.
For example, during that time I observed that more and more, even with challenges that are presented to us, taking a moment, to not "react" immediately, and making the choice to love; to respond with love rather than defensiveness, really helps us evolve. To withdraw our energy from struggle, (or our story of being "wronged") in whatever form this takes in your life, are some key relational issues that we as beings of light, are being initiated in at this time; from my perspective. I certainly had to navigate so many of these during this time, and thereafter, and wanted to share with you, that which I gleaned.
I further believe the intensity of the energies that are being transmitted to us, at this time, are for assistance in expediting not only our interpersonal healing (via our unique soul challenges), but ultimately they then help us to raise our planetary consciousness, through these very personal challenges/triumphs experienced.
We are powerful beings. Yet, as we all know, there is only one way to harness our true power. And that is through love. How do we do this? Use your power, when triggered, to take a moment, breathe, give yourself the time and space to shift your perspective and energy and focus to what you would PREFER to happen versus, what you're upset about. This helps us to conserve our energy that normally we may utilize to feel "badly" and in turn we choose not to "react" immediately.
This then assists us to make a new choice to "act" differently, less defensively, when we are hurt or upset. And re-train or energize the good things or positive things that we're learning from a situation. We know that "harping on" and retelling the tale of woe again and again, actually adds more negative energy to the situation, and more of the same of what we DON'T want to us!
As humans, or "spirits in form," to bring a lasting change to ourselves is to positively impact our communities, and our world at large. If we begin to open to more love and understanding within our own hearts, our own lives, our own families, our own work environments: in so doing, this folds out. It creates a ripple effect of tranquility and peace.
The choice to live in the light that is our true essence and the truth of who we are deep within and well beyond our "personality or ego level," is enlightenment! Our own reactions, and how we relate to others...from a place of centeredness, even when there is injustice, disrespect, or the energy of negative intention aimed your way, is absolute mastery in relating.
"Turning the other cheek," is a teaching that I'm reminded of when I think of these challenges, and what is happening more frequently now. These are opportunities for us to REMEMBER who we really are, and to act from that place, rather than from the place that needs to be understood, or to defend our stance etc. Tricky huh???
And yet, we have the power to do that.
Energy and Consciousness:
Within every moment of every day, lies that opportunity. Whatever we focus on, flourishes. So be conscious of where you want to aim your focus! Energy creates! What do you want to create? Focus on that.
It is difficult to not lend our energy to problems, worries & strife. This is the 3rd dimension, it's dense! Which is why the energy of our self-created or co-created problems" are dense. Like attracts like. But knowledge is power!!! If we know that this is a vibratory planet that magnifies what we focus on and thus energize, let's create consciously what we DO want. And de-energize what we DON'T want. Life will then begin to move in the direction of your goals, and your dreams realized, and you'll feel less constricted, stuck and powerless.
I feel like this year is an important time to collectively support each other, to "turn the other cheek" and focus our energies on changing our own reactions to things. To see situations that are presented, as an opportunity to not take things personally, thus letting go of our habitual defenses. And not giving in to this "world of illusion" otherwise known as "Maya". That frankly, feels so real.
In my opinion, this is the greatest step towards not only personal enlightenment, but World Peace. Again, I reiterate, we are powerful beings.Will we choose to act from love and light, even when we are being wronged? What do we fight for? And what do we surrender?
~These are our struggles now as light workers.
~Our greatest fears in relating, are up for us to have the opportunities to relate differently.
~To get out of our own personal "Ground Hog's Day."
~This results in our personal evolution,
as well as global consciousness raised.
If we incarnate to open and expand more fully to both give and receive love, and to choose love, even when darkness descends, let's be conscious of that destiny.
(In our own unique ways, of course, as we all have our own reasons for being here.)
This is the ultimate power of our divine essence, housed deep inside these little houses- we call our bodies.
Prayers for the Earth
I personally am dedicated to this mission not only in my own life, but in supporting you. My prayer is to ask that we hold each other's hand, and visualize a circle, a global circle, as we make choices to inspire and aspire to a higher level of relating. I pray that we consciously remember that we came here to make a difference -at a very tenuous time in earth history.
Let's awaken to our true magnificence, and risk shining our light for others, who are having a hard time seeing for the darkness of this physical realm. May love and light and peace unfold from the depths of our hearts, to all that struggle. And when we fall, have a hard day, and react from an old place of relating, may we forgive ourselves for our human frailties, and our own dark places that we continue to clear, and allow our true light to nestle in. May we then, in the next moment, choose to act from our highest truth.
May we support each other in this effort. We need it, our families need it, our neighbors need it, and our world, it's leaders and it's global community need it.
Be who you truly are, an eternal being
of light and love, housed in the fragile shell
of flesh and bone.
Top Three Life Balance Skills
That Lead To A Long Term, Fulfilling Career In The Helping Professions
By Joy Adler, Wellness Instructor, Student, Faculty and Administrative Advisor
The Center for Natural Wellness, Albany, NY
It is always so poignant for us at the Center For Natural Wellness. Last Friday we had 2 classes of graduates! Prior to this life-changing event in our curriculum for Wellness & Emotional Growth that I teach with Laura-Michelle Iacovone for the Full time groups, we have the honor of teaching soon-to-be graduating students, the skills of Life Balance and Support Systems for those in the helping profession.I
In class, we bring a panel of instructors and/or grads that tell stories to students that they’ve learned after graduation and throughout their careers regarding boundaries around “Time, sex and money.” It is always a great opportunity to hear from people of varied experience…and I am always learning too! One of the things we discuss is some of the qualities and skills that lead to a life-long, fulfilling career. I will share the top three that I hear most frequently, and that we dialogue about in class. And if you’d even like to come in and join us for a future panel…please let us know!
1. Be The Mantle of Self-Care. Yes, you hear it again and again, but it’s true! Practice putting yourselves on your day planner first and foremost! Schedule yourself for your own massage, facials, supervision, and exercise before you ever place a client or work on your calendar. If you begin to put yourself on the back burner, so to speak, this leads to breaking your own boundaries. which creates resentment. A tricky red-flag that we’ll get into in a future article! Hands down (pardon the pun) this in the number one skill for long-term success. It results in less injury, better balance, and love of the profession you chose. Remember, when we have “filled our own well” then we really enjoy giving to others. I often hear my friends and colleagues talking about their week, and the ones that are most successful are always quick to mention what they have lined up for themselves that they are looking forward to before even mentioning their schedule of clients. I call this “healthy selfishness”.
2. Daily Space And Time To Reflect On The Day’s Work With Clients. When we give ourselves meditative time to reflect on the great work we’ve done, and we look to see what each client was mirroring to us, about ourselves…we in effect do another key thing to replenish ourselves... We refill our own well. By looking for the gift each client offers us, in terms of what they mirror to us, or teach us about ourselves and our path, we cultivate a great practice to get into at day’s end. Taking time to receive the benefit of your goodness, and the blessings that each client offers, gives us a mini- healing and restores our energy at days end. If we begin to take these deeply meaningful transactions for granted, we leave unopened gifts that could revitalize us, and help us remember why we got into the helping professions to begin with! Ultimately, this assists us in balancing all the giving with receiving too!
3. Continuing Education. Yup, being forever curious after we’ve been in the field for awhile can keep us interested and motivated. I notice that some of our most seasoned instructors with decades of experience are always in search of new knowledge. This openness, this humbleness keeps us fresh. We then bring that new energy, enthusiasm and inspiration to our clients, and they are thus enriched. This is a way of holding ourselves in integrity. As role models to our client’s, beloveds and peers, that we as practitioners are forever learning as well!
For example, at our recent teacher training, Dale Perry showed us a video of new medical research that emphasized the importance of receiving massage 3 days post-op, to avoid scar tissue and adhesions. Now, this is not my specialty, but Dale’s interest, expertise, and willingness to share what he had learned taught me something that I could pass on to my clients who are facing surgery, and why that may be important. And of course, then I refer them to whose specialty it is, as an adjunct to our work. So as you can see, as we learn and share that knowledge, many lives are enhanced!
I hope this is helpful validation of what you’ve learned that assists in you in maintaining your balance. Next time, I will share the aforementioned “Red-flags” that let us know when we’ve gotten out of our optimal balance, as we all do from time to time! Feel free to share any stories, comments, or “aha” moments with me, at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Okay my friends, I am going to get on a soapbox here for a moment...I am from a mountains and lake region, so when I moved to the Jersey Shore many years ago, before returning to my beloved NY, the best piece of advice I ever received from Locals was to "Never turn your back on the Sea." Sound advice, because you never know when a wave is going to hit you....and rock your world.
For me- having a private practice in two cities, I have seen an alarming number of trauma/assault victims coming into my practice for emotional/trauma release, all women thus far. Why? Because they were running in a park, listening to their jams, or on a subway...and simply trying to "carve out their own boundary/need for space" through listening to tunes on their Iphones/ipods, and didn't hear their assailant, following them. I IMPLORE you NOT to listen to music when you are in a city or any bike trail...etc. Please, please. When you do, you are taking the city for granted, which is a huge error in judgement. Do not be righteous or callous, be cautious.
When you tune out one of your greatest allies (hearing) to alert you to predators, (who typically come up behind you..counting on you grooving to your own beats,) you open yourself up for a wave that can rock your world. Please don't turn your back to the city...remember this: "Your ears are your eyes in the back of your head". To be blind and deaf to the fact that there are people that look to prey on people that do this- is mistake that could potentially change your life in ways that you can barely imagine. My own daughter recently had a very disturbing incident in NYC..luckily she was NOT wearing ear buds....and escaped......Thank God.
Please let those you know who may do this aware of the rise in occurrences of this sort, and thus the potential risks....May we all be safe, protected, and free from harm.
Happy New Year!
The future looks bright
I know many of us enjoy this time of year to contract deep within ourselves, and reflect on the year that we’ve completed, and from that understanding, note what goals we want to for the year to come. At this stage of my life, I realize more than ever that I am only one person. I consider the potential years I have left on this plane to make a difference, and I pray to be guided in how I, just one person can economize my energy, and yet share what I am passionate about. I have considered how I can continue to train people, so that the teachings that I have learned and have developed over time, can be shared, and taught by others. I understand that through professional certification,and continuing education credits, others can feel confident to bring this work out and then it multiplies and ripples out, and more and more people can heal, and our frequency gets higher and higher. This is what I feel is heaven on earth. I know we are all part of this. I like to think that since all of us are dedicated to doing that in our own ways, one day our own individual efforts multiplied with each other, can create world peace by healing our own wounds from hate, pain, sadness and injustice. From trauma to triumph, this is what opening our hearts with one another does! And learning skills from our own healing to serve humanity does.
This year not only did I have the pleasure of working with so many CNW and BBSH students, but watching them graduate is always so moving...to see you reach hard won goals is another dream come true for me. To see beloved clients strive to release the past, and manifest the future of their dreams, is always fulfilling for me...and reminds me that after all of these years, I still absolutely love what I do.
Some courses came full circle in 2013, like Psychology of the Body. After teaching many people in several different states, since1998, in body- centered approaches, this then created space for the program I created next called: Energy Diagnostics. I am just loving this course!! The transformation is so high vibrational that this semester I am continuing to train others in it, but am also including the option of offering certification and CEU's for those that have already taken the course, but who feel drawn to learn how to teach this course, and develop it further for themselves.
Hence, I am so passionate about the healing effects of combining massage and energy work, and I am thrilled at the experienced Masters, who have felt drawn to this teaching, that I am truly looking forward to showing them how to teach it themselves!
Laura and I also continued to offer Master classes in the Goddess Series in 2013. I will continue to channel advanced trainings in 2014 for our ongoing ancestral healing and balancing of the masculine and feminine energies, for the purpose of balancing those potent energies within ourselves, but also for planetary healing. I feel, as I mentioned in my Fall Newsletter, that this is part of my mission in this life. And trust me, it's a constant effort to balance these energies for myself, in such a busy society!!! To unplug, to go against the grain of society, to connect with self and nature all around. I feel like, as we reconnect to nature, we connect to our authentic nature and that which sustains us, but it definitely puts me “against the nature” and grain of society. Oh well!
In the past, and my early adult life, I have experienced considerable pain and suffering when I attempted to “conform” to what I had as a framework for adulthood, including the models of work and relationships all around me. So it was a relief to note that now that I am in these middle-life years, I have such contentment with my mission on earth. When I am asked about my life, for me, the question is not if I'm okay because of what I own, how much family I have around me, or whom I have in my life. For me the daily querie is; Am I in alignment with my spirit? Am I living with and in truth with my reason for incarnating? Am I on track? The truth is for me there is no thing outside of myself that I need!
My work as a healer, counselor, educator and sound healer is my calling. And I am very true to that call. I feel that I took a sacred vow. What is the sacred vow that you took? For me it is nice to have the opportunity to reflect on how questions about what my life looks like, now feels like it is in so much duality for me personally. I have to pull myself in from the expansion that I experience so much of the time, to consider it at all. Yet it always helps me to see that I have truly ascended within myself, to know that as long as I am connected deeply with me, then I am united with the oneness in all things, and my connection to everything and everyone...And then, I am at peace.
Thus, breaking through "Maya" the great cosmic illusion. I will share with you what I have learned through many a painful experience. There is no person or situation outside of ourselves that will fulfill us. Living in love is my primary relationship, living in truth is being married to my path, my partner is spirit, and then anything from that is simply icing on the cake of life. Yet I am the cake! This is my teaching, I live that, I have learned through the lesson of “Maya”, and hardship that all fulfillment is self- fulfillment...when we marry ourselves, are committed to our own life, and soul purpose, then the external world complies with this, and all our longings are met...with sincere detachment to any demand that life brings great wealth, the perfect partner, job, car etc..we break through the veil of maya, to the deepest truth. And all that is meant for us comes...free of attachment to any outcome.
I so love it when I see clients genuinely get this, after a life challenge that brings pain, when they are chasing that external dream or demand their whole lives...When they breakthrough this third dimensional illusion, I love hearing how immediately all that they longed for flow to them quite quickly upon this realization, makes having to have gone through that illusion myself many times, all worth it. The emancipation of their spirits...their dreams coming true, from having surrendered the demand and the expectations and opened to the truth of all that they are, and that they are one with all things, and that it is enough.
My friends, if this was my last day on earth, this is what I would want to share with you. Attachment to anything outside of yourself will bring you immense suffering. You’ve heard it in many ways, you’ve read it, this is my truth now, my version. And I wanted to share that awareness straight from my heart to yours....
May you live in peace, may you know this oneness, may you remember the truth of who you are, and why you determined you would be here now, on this plane at this time in earth history. We are all in this together, we are all here as one...now and forever, Joy
Tips for Optimal Balance and Wellness
Earlier this year at one of our meditative events, I chose to channel the element Fire, as we had been working with both Earth, Water and Air for the last two years. As our vibrations soared together that evening, I was stoking the flames from the center of the earth up--for people to tap into their true power and passion. Fire increases our immune system support, provides us with an immense amount of energy from which to create, or recreate our lives. It also heals anxiety and depression! So it is important to assess our internal-eternal flame. For there are times, if we feel low, our fire begins to go out, or we subdue it. For some folks, perhaps in a subconscious way they learned to make others feel okay in the presence of their power (fire)-so as not to get "burned"!
We can also water it down, when our lives get bogged down with emotion/water or heavy from our life's burdens on earth Or perhaps we give our power/fire away, or allow it to be taken, or we get anxious and ungrounded, and the air in our being becomes imbalanced and then fans our fire too bright-so we feel agitated or angry often. All of these variations create an imbalance in our systems and lives. Attending to balancing the elements that we are made up of is essential to have a balanced, fulfilling, peaceful existence.
To remember that we have an unlimited supply of earth/fire energy from which to activate our most alive presence. To tap into the vital life force that awakens our passion, and gives rise the the energy from which to birth our creations is our birthright and an essential aspect of our life's purpose. Without fire there can be no "drive toward action." Not from a willful pace, but from a place of deep knowing-and centered power-deeply grounded into the molten core of the earth.
When we are aligned and balanced in fire, there is a natural impetus for growth-a burning away of all that does not serve us, the world, or our soul's purpose.....and a brightening of the path that we are to follow...where all that is meant for us is shown--Ease, grace & syncronicities-place these opportunities like a a holy grail fired from the kiln of the earth goddess herself, at our feet. And upon awakening after the burn..we arise with new feathers...as a Phoenix spreading our wings across the land in a more enlightened and expanded way.
Are you ready for the kiln of earthen fire to reward and and burn a way all that you are complete with to make space for that which IS MEANT FOR YOU? Fire will do that...tap in, balance yourself via the elements and prepare yourself for the fire of true transformation!